Those of you who are wondering why Obama can't deliver the knockout blow to Hillary's campaign are misapprehending the true nature of the dilemma. The real question is, how do you knock a zombie out of a tough political contest without compromising your principles and potentially hurting your own chances? We all know that ordinary candidates are relatively easy to dispatch. You out-inspire and out-stump them. You outspend and out-advertise them. Nothing to it, really. With zombies, however, things are a bit more complicated.
According to Wikipedia, a zombie is a "reanimated corpse . . . Typically, these creatures can sustain damage far beyond that of a normal, living human . . . " Like a zombie, Hillary's campaign was dead, but has now apparently been reanimated by her victory in Pennsylvania. Also like a zombie, she apparently needs none of the things that a non-zombie candidate would require in order to keep her campaign lurching forward, like new donors, or balance sheets that are in the black, or even a reasonable chance to secure victory at the convention in August by above-board means.
Yeah, she's a zombie, albeit one of the most articulate, well informed and energetic zombies ever to appear on the national stage. The truth is that lately she's never looked more human. Hillary does the best zombie-impersonation of a real live candidate that I've ever seen, and voters, especially women and older folks, are really buying her act.
The folks in the best position to expose Hillary's zombified, undead status are the Republican talking heads, since the GOP has several zombies in their ranks these days, including one big stupid zombie in the White House. But we also know that these GOP mouthpieces wouldn't be caught dead with a zombie-exposing whistle between their lips. To the contrary, the Pat Buchanans and Joe Scarboroughs of the world are literally climbing over each other to reassure Democrats in the remaining primary states that she's NOT a zombie, and that she's still got a real shot at this thing, presumably in order to prolong the Democrats' nominating contest as long as "humanly" possible, if you'll pardon the expression.
Let me assure you that this is no laughing matter. Zombie-Hillary presents two big problems for Obama. First, all the zombie experts I've spoken to confirm that it takes an extraordinary ass-kicking to put zombies out of commission for good. You can't just kill them, since they're already dead. Essentially, you need to dismember a zombie campaign, limb from limb, and scatter the parts to the four winds so that it can't reconstitute itself when you're not looking. Obama, with his squeaky clean campaign strategies, politics of hope and purported lack of killer instincts, may not be situated to put the necessary smackdown on this unusually tough zombie without compromising his principles and turning off Democrats, who expect better of him. He can't afford to go negative and risk dividing the party, and his usual shtick doesn't seem to be delivering the much anticipated knockout blow.
The bigger problem, not addressed anywhere in the leading zombie literature, is as follows. Given enough external stimuli, is it possible for a zombie to regain enough vitality to overcome its undead status and re-enter the land of the living as a reconstituted flesh and blood candidate? Exhibit A - John McCain, who was buried in an unmarked grave last summer after his campaign committed suicide with a self-inflicted stake through the heart, and who has since been reanimated to become the presumptive nominee. It's well documented that the HRC campaign didn't have a strategy beyond Super Tuesday, and for a while Obama administered a real ass-whupping as a result. However, HRC's halftime adjustments, although long in coming, may finally be turning the tide, and Obama needs to call timeout and reassess his strategy before the next contests in Indiana and North Carolina.
If I were Obama, in the next week or so I'd focus all my energies on finding a winning strategy, albeit a polite, gentlemanly one, to knock Hillary-zombie out of the race with all possible speed, before she finishes transforming herself from the zombie that we've all grown used to over the last few weeks to Hillary Clinton, flesh and blood candidate. Otherwise, both Obama and the Democrats may be facing some real trouble in the near future, in the form of an insurmountable party divide.